Thursday, October 30, 2008

Nicole Kidman is lovely, but ...

Much, much less respect for her after these comments in PARADE magazine:
As a new mother to daughter Sunday Rose, Nicole Kidman has reacted intensely with "whatever that primal thing is, the need and desire to keep her very protected," she says. "People say, 'Oh, it would be so much easier if you'd just let them get a photo of her.' And I can't. I'm like, 'I don't want to. I want her to stay out of that.' Maybe that will wane as she gets bigger, and I'll be easier with it. But for now, I'm still keeping her in a bubble." Her eyes turn red and moist. "I'm raw and emotional," Kidman admits. "I cry even thinking of her. But they are tears of joy. Because I suppose I never thought I would get to have it. To have been given it so late in life—I'm so ready for it. And I think giving birth to a child, as a woman, is what we're born to do. I don't mean that to sound sexist, because many women don't get to do it, and I thought I was one of them. But at the same time, if you are given that gift, it's an extraordinary thing."
As someone who cannot have children of my own, might I ask Ms. Kidman then, what *I* was put on this earth to do? She is a shame and a blight to all adoptive mothers - no, MOTHERS, period - who consider the little boys and girls they raise to be every bit the blessing birth children would be - moreso, as for us "mere mortals" outside the Hollywood Bubble, it is so much more of a struggle and an achievement to adopt than to give birth. After all - one road to parenting involves being carefully observed and interviewed and considered as a parent; the other can be as simple as some drunken mistake.

I can say with confidence that given she obviously never dealt with the emotional baggage she attached to her fertility, nor, apparently, did she allow herself to bond with her adoptive children or protect them now from comments that surely must be hurtful (no WONDER they call their father's new wife, Katie Holmes, "Mom", and Nicole, "Nicole"), that no adoption worker or child welfare agency in the world would have allowed Nicole Kidman to adopt with those issues left un-dealt with if she were not rich and famous.

I emphathize with the infertility struggle, and I emphathize with her marrying, adopting children, and divorcing all at a relatively young age, and I'm sure she's a wonderful person - but that does not make her a wonderful adoptive mother, and I feel very much for her children right now.

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